


Happy Halloween (or where Steve and Darcy need Costumes)

by The_Marauders_Daughter



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Halloween
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-01
Updated: 2013-11-01
Packaged: 2017-12-31 03:00:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1026486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Marauders_Daughter/pseuds/The_Marauders_Daughter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Where Darcy and Steve need a couples-costume for Halloween. And hilarity of all kinds ensue. May be a little crack-y.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Happy Halloween (or where Steve and Darcy need Costumes)

**Author's Note:**

> AN: …alright, so I got home from work around midnight last night, was nearly late for class this morning, got back a test I was sure I had passed graded with a 48 and then bought myself a pity-coffee, so the stress and extra shot of espresso reminded me that today is Halloween, and this idea popped into my head so I shrugged and thought, ‘meh, why the hell not?’ …so, here you have it. I apologize because this may be very close to crack.

“How about these?”

Darcy turned and saw Steve holding up a pair of handcuffs. “Are you trying to tell me something, soldier?”

He shot her a grin. “Well, I would if I didn’t already know we had a pair at home.”

“You’re an ass,” she laughed, throwing a pair of plastic horns in his direction. “Now get back to looking.”

“I still don’t understand why I can’t wear my uniform.”

“Steve, it’s a costume party. You can’t go to a costume party dressed as yourself. No,” she interrupted when he opened his mouth to protest. “You can’t go in service dress either.”

“Fine,” he sighed.

It was really just a series of bad luck that led to them hunting the empty shelves of a Party City the day of Halloween. They’d discussed costume ideas as far back as August, when Darcy’d updated Steve on how Halloween was celebrated in the 21st century. It was her favorite holiday, she said, because you could be anything you wanted to for the night and got to scare the shit out of everyone (her words, not his) without getting in trouble.

Once October hit, their free time was always limited by Steve leading the team against the monsters that never seemed to take a day off. Even when he got a break, Darcy was working her ass off 30 hours a day (again, her words) as Pepper’s assistant. Whenever they did have time together, Halloween was honestly the last thing on their minds (exhibit A: the handcuffs in the bedside table).

It wasn’t until Bruce of all people reminded Steve about Tony’s costume party that the date hit them hard. They had already gone through Wal-Mart and the specialty costume store, but the walls were tapped, fake blood and crappy wigs left on the otherwise bare shelves.

“Aha!” Darcy turned and shook her head at the fake fangs Steve had in his hand.

“Hell to the no.” She turned around again and felt the teeth hit her behind. “Steven Grant Rogers!” The sly smile he sent in her direction made her roll her eyes and sigh.

The search would’ve ended hours ago if Steve hadn’t added the condition that they go as a couple. “It’s not like they don’t know we’re an "us",” she’d protested. “We live together and they caught us in the closet last week!” But Steve had been adamant, stating that he wanted to share his first 'real' Halloween with his girl and damn if that hadn’t melted her heart.

And so they reached the end of the store, finding nothing more promising than a black bowler hat and a pair of cat ears. Steve looked at Darcy out of the corner of his eye.

“I am _not_ going as Catwoman!”

*

So, after a tiny heated debate that ended in a make-out session that got them kicked out of Party-City, they decided to go home and see if there was anything they could make from what was hiding in their rooms. The entire closet and some of the pantry was laid out on their bed when Clint poked his head through the door.

“Hi. Uh…” he pointed at the black leather jacket in Darcy’s hand. “You guys going as greasers?”

“No,” Darcy huffed. “We don’t have any pants that could work for Steve—Barton, why are you green?”

Steve’s jaw dropped. “Please tell me you aren’t going as the Hulk.”

“No, Pepper and Natasha would kill me.” He pulled a pair of nun chucks out from his pocket. “I’m going as Michaelangelo.”

“Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Really?”

Clint narrowed his eyes at Darcy. “If you even _suggest_ Robin Hood I’m going to make Steve single again.”

“What do you need?” Steve asked quickly before the nun chucks were put to use for real. Even though they were extremely close friends, if a fight broke out no one would make it to the party.

Once Clint was dispatched with an orange scarf and a pair of shoes Steve knew he’d never see again, they returned to the original problem.

“Damn.”

*

“Maybe we could try zombies.”

“No…” In a sight very few people had ever witnessed, Captain America groaned and threw himself on the bed. “Everyone is going to go as a zombie,” he whined into the pillows.

“Good point,” Darcy said, throwing back her torn-up jeans and climbed up next to him. She debated her idea for all of two seconds and perched herself on the curve of his ass.

“Darcy…” This time the moan had an entirely different tone.

She pitched herself forward so her breasts pressed against his back. “Do we really need to go to the party?” she whispered into his ear, running her hand through his hair.

Steve bit back a moan. “We need to go. Captain America needs to schmooze people.”

“Well, what if the Captain took a tiny leave of absence?" Her free hand began to travel up his shirt. "Steve Rogers is certainly allowed to spend Halloween with his—”

“Steve, do you—Sorry!” In a flash they were off the bed and looking at Bruce, who was covering his eyes and looked even more red-faced than they did. “I’m sorry, the door was open!”

“Stupid Barton,” Darcy growled and pulled Bruce’s hand away. “You’re fine, Bruce. You saw more of us last week anyway.”

He flushed again at the mention of the closet-incident and willed himself to look Darcy in the face. “I’m—”

“—sorry,” Steve finished. “It’s ok, Bruce.”

“Right. I— uh, I just needed to borrow your watch for a little bit, just for tonight.”

Darcy popped herself down on the bed. Her eyes took in the tweed suit he wore, not too much different than what he usually wore for his guest lectures at Chelsea University. “What are you going as, Doc?”

Bruce gratefully took the pocket watch Steve held out to him. “Sherlock Holmes. I have a hat and a pipe upstairs.”

“That’s a great idea.” Steve took another look at the pile of cloth in front of them. “You wouldn’t happen to know any couples costumes we can make from this in two hours, do you?”

The good doctor took one look at the pile and shook his head. “I’m not really good at this sort of thing.”

“Please, Bruce?”

He thought for a moment and his face turned a pale shade of pink. “I have one idea, if you don’t mind walking around in your underwear.”

His suggestion of Adam and Eve quickly smothered, he returned bashfully to his room.

*

Even though Tony had invited the team&co to celebrate Halloween together, the costume party was officially a thank you for clients of SI and potential new buyers. The guest list included politicians, a couple of socialites that Tony was definitely not to approach, and the few reporters SHIELD could trust to not get everyone killed.

So really, only one reporter.

The guests arrived at the main entertaining floor located halfway up the Stark Tower (lovingly known as the Avenger’s Tower to its inhabitants) and once the booze got flowing, the party was in full swing.

Tony, being Tony, insisted on being a superhero for the night and could be seen jumping from patron to party girl to politician dressed in full gear as Batman.

Working her way behind him was Pepper, decked out in a truly incredible Poison Ivy costume modest enough to keep it classy. The only problem was that classy was also sexy, and she had to fend off several passes at her rear end that called Batman’s attention on more than one occasion.

Clint was circulating as Anonymous Guest #7, although his costume got him a lot of attention as well. While most people would not be able to recognize Hawkeye in full mission gear, much less dressed as an enormous turtle complete with shell, he played up his part as a family friend of Pepper’s.

Batman and Mikey were in the middle of a flirting contest when Steve and Darcy made it through the doors. “Hey, look at who finally came” Batman walked over and looked them up and down. “I actually thought you were going to end up coming as something nauseatingly cute like ketchup and mustard.”

Steve crossed his arms over his chest and raised an eyebrow. “Batman? Really?”

“What? You haven’t seen those memes? ‘Always be yourself, unless you can be Batman. _Always_ be Batman.’”

“Did they run out of plug and outlet costumes at the store?” Darcy asked.

“He actually bought them,” Clint laughed behind him. “Pepper threw them out.” He took in their costumes. “Bonnie and Clyde?”

Steve raised his hat ran a hand over his slicked-back hair. “I was surprised we actually had all the parts for it.”

Darcy looked up at him past her cloche and smirked her bright red lips. “Come on, hon,” she said in the worst Chicago accent he’d ever heard. “Let’s circulate.”

*

And circulate they did. Steve schmoozed, Darcy boozed, and they enjoyed giggling over the costumes some people had come in.

“I swear,” she laughed, “if I see one more senator dressed as zombie Caesar I’m going to pee myself.”

“Better than the guy dressed in a kilt.”

“Or the girls dressed as Crayola crayons?”

“Do you think that last one is really a Playboy bunny?” Steve ducked Darcy’s playful smack and kissed her instead.

“Hilarious, Rogers.”

He opened his mouth to answer when the words died in his throat. “Darcy…”

She followed his line of sight and nearly spat out her martini. “What the hell?!” She threw the glass down and pulled Steve along with her. “Thor?!”

“Hello, my friends!” He boomed. “I find this feast to be most amusing. Tell me, have you seen the man dressed as a banana?”

“Thor, what the…” Darcy gestured at his costume.

“Oh, yes!” He turned and she burst out laughing at the full sight. “Jane has told me this is an appropriate disguise for me tonight.” He turned his head to look for Jane, causing his yellow, black-tipped ears to fall over his eyes. “This character is a ‘choose-a-chew’.”

Steve managed to reign in his own hysteria. He actually recognized the costume! “Thor, buddy, I think the name is _Pikachu_.” The name sent Darcy falling over into a fresh attack of giggles and Jane found her a moment later.

“Isn’t he cute?” She threw back her cloak, revealing a Hogwarts costume underneath. She pointed her wand at Darcy, who just shook her head, crying from laughing so much.

Steve couldn’t hold his composure anymore and leaned against the wall, hysterical laughter spilling out everywhere. They couldn’t even answer Thor’s question about what their own costumes were and when Bruce showed up, Sherlock hat falling off his head and flanked by an irate looking Natasha Romanoff sporting a couple of purple shells over her chest and a fishtail, they completely lost it.

Together, Bonnie and Clyde ran through the crowd and made it to balcony. They proceeded to laugh themselves onto the floor, scaring away the vampire making out with the zombie in the corner and they were blissfully alone.

Every look they exchanged sent them into a new wave of crazy harder than the last. Eventually, they managed to calm down and lay together on the floor.

“I’m exhausted,” he sighed.

Darcy only nodded and lifted her head just enough to rest it on his chest.

“They probably think we’re insane, don’t they?”

She nodded again.

They lay there in silence for a while, looking up at the sky. Steve was running his hand through Darcy’s hair, the fingers of their other hands entwined. “Tonight is probably not the best night to tell them, is it?”

Darcy pulled herself up and looked at him. Her eyes stayed locked on his, bringing her lips to met his own. “We can tell them at any time,” she whispered when she pulled away. “I kinda wanna see how Batman reacts to that.”

Steve chuckled. “We should probably wait for the party to finish.”

Darcy sat up and pulled a thin chain from around her neck. The light from inside made the beautiful diamond ring gleam. “I can’t wait until I can finally wear this on my finger.”

“Me neither,” he whispered. He leaned forward and kissed her again. “I love you, Mrs. Rogers.”

She sighed against his lips. “And I love you, Captain Rogers.” She stowed the chain back under her dress. “Quick question: how do you feel about celebrating on the balcony?”

He chuckled, bringing her back down to him. “Definitely the best Halloween ever.”

**Author's Note:**

> (Holy s**t, before I researched it I had no idea Chris Evans was in TMNT. I haven’t even seen that movie!) Go ahead and flame, I'm nursing a caffeine headache.


End file.
